Never Happy

Do you hover over us or sit on our head

Since the first day of our lives, helpless and small?

Are you gravity, the weight of the world over us?

Melding us with this earth, holding our necks down,

Making us crawl.

Do you appear just before that moment?

Because you're strangely absent afterwards in the void,

And long before that moment, we only feel your presence for perspective,

While passing judgment on a life lived, faces seen,

Destinies toyed.

Why do you need to pave your way with misery?

Why not just come and go, without regrets, without pain?

Do you feel the need sometimes to feel welcome?

Do you feel the need sometimes to not be cursed at,

To not be despised, not be resented by the sane?

Do you always feel the need to enter a home,

Through the broad roads of despair, not happiness

And it's narrow lane?

Do you like this ambiguity of being the saviour and the villain?

Do you like to see people suffer or do you like to see them enraged?

Do you like to give the illusion of deliverance?

Do you like to stoke the embers of their rage?

Do you like to break down ruthlessly every vestige of defiance?

Do you like the way you release the hurricanes of the human mind,

Uncontrolled, unbridled out of their cage?

Perhaps you know you'll always be despised, always resented,

And so you revel in your excesses, your injustices, sickening.

Perhaps you hate us as much as we do you,

Try and assert your ultimate superiority,

With happiness receding and wills weakening.

As yet you've failed, but perhaps you'll succeed,

But the war can only be won by me,

Because when you succeed, you'll long since have appeared,

And you'll still be despised with all my being,

With a relief and a rage as big as the sea.