Showing posts with label Movie Review - When I can be bothered. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Movie Review - When I can be bothered. Show all posts

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Sweeney Bloodyknifehands

       From the start to the end, you're left in no doubt that it's a Tim Burton film. All of his dark, macabre, eccentric signatures are right in place in the film, unmistakeable, subtle and in your face in the same time.

        London is dreary and hopeless, a god forsaken city, inhabited by vermin, as Sweeney so menacingly tells us. Who is Sweeney? Well, he was a barber with a different (more normal) name, with a pretty wife and a pretty child, who is packed off to Australia on false charges, because judge (Turpin) has eyes on Sweeney's wife. Until he's found by a young sailor (Anthony) 15 years later. When he moves back to his house/shop in Fleet Street, he finds the landlady (Mrs. Lovett, who's as much of a loony as Sweeney) baking the worst meat-pies in London, who tells him about the fate of his family. The wife raped by the judge, later gulps down arsenic, and the child adopted by the same judge who is the root of all of Sweeney's misery. Thus he goes mad with rage. After that follows a series of events which is best left covered up. I'll divulge only the following : the sailor who saved Sweeney falls in love with his daughter (I feeeeeeeeel youuuuu, Johannaaaaa!!), and the judge also wants to make her his wife. Oh and the chair, though I guess most promos have already shown it (again and again) - sinister, very very sinister.

         Johnny Depp just becomes more immense with every film, every performance. There's not much more to say really. One of the finest of his generation. Helena Bonham-Carter is brilliant as well. Infact, I can't think of anyone else to play Mrs, Lovett, even more so than Depp/Sweeney, she's so perfect. You fall in love and are repulsed by her in equal measure. BRILLIANT. Alan Rickman is suitably evil, Timothy Spall as slimy as he has ever been. Sacha Baron Cohen, as Signor Pirelli, a rival barber, who in a way starts 'it', is madcap as always (very good actor nonetheless). The sailor and the daughter don't have much to do, but do it well anyways. Toby, the boy employed by Pirelli from a work-house, and later Mrs. Lovett is surprisingly good as well. Surprisingly because you don't expect a child to be an important character in a movie like this, and it finally turns out he is.
 
        The music's quite good. The singing's quite decent, the situations almost perfect. Go to the theatres to see a film which is quite exquisitely, breathtakingly, brilliantly beautiful. The humour will almost induce a laugh, and then a blush that you could laugh at things like that. There'll be people you pity, who you shouldn't, and enjoy deaths of people you should pity. The actors will own you for those couple of hours, the film will possess you. I mean, a musical about serial killing. You'd be stupid not to see it.

         However if you're queasy in the sight of blood, stay faaaaaar away. This is one of the bloodiest, most violent films I've ever seen.

Tuesday, July 3, 2007

Jhoom Barabar Jhoom - The 3 hour long fancy dress competition

We were supposed to go and watch Shootout At Lokhandwala. So we promptly reached the theatre at 7.30 pm. Only problem, the last show of Shootout At Lokhandwala was at 6.30 pm. Being an evil multiplex and all, it had the temptation of a 8 pm show of JBJ. Needless to say we succumbed.

So, we get on the elevator, packed with insufferably giggly people - ranging from age-groups 12 to 60  of both sexes - talking about the dresses they saw Lara Dutta and Preity Zinta wear in the promos, casually throwing the names of the Director and Producer as though they knew them personally. Possibly the longest 15 seconds a human being can go through. We rush out of the elevator before we catch the contagious disease these people seem to be suffering from, get 3 cups of coffee from the counter, where the nutcase behind it politely asks us to stand in line even though we are the only ones there. And then we enter the hall.

After trailers of Apne and Chak De India, the film started with Amitabh Bachan looking like Captain Jack Sparrow's father, doing the Keith Richards impression with a guitar. Enter Abhishek with the now old and cliched swagger and Preity looking, er, pretty. And then they concoct stories about their 'fiances', which try to be funny, almost are, but just fall short. Then both of them fall for each other, to maintain the falling pattern. Then they have a dance competition, kiss in the streets and probably marry each other. The End.

That about does it for the story, there's Lara Dutta and Bobby Deol in many places, being a French hotel manager and a cussing prostitute, a super wealthy lawyer and a mama's boy, and all four of them dressing like no one could in the real world unless they were filthy rich and bonkers in the head.

I would write more, but frankly there isn't much to say about this film.